Books
A Dance With Dragons
Written by: George RR Martin
7.5/10
This one was a lot bleaker than the others, but I'm willing to believe there is some emotional bias to that feeling. It has been a fascinating and exciting journey reading through the Song of Ice and Fire series this year and knowing I'm at the end of the road probably added to a certain level of melancholy. For the record, I do not believe The Winds of Winter is ever getting published. It's been just about a decade now and I just have this nihilistic belief that the HBO ending is the only one we get to have. But it isn't just my personal bias that attributes the the more bleak and brutal atmosphere of this instalment.
Perhaps the bleakest of the perspectives and storylines are all of those involving Stannis and the conquest of the northern lands (Theon/Reek, the pirates, Stannis, Davos, and Jon Snow). I was thrilled at first to see more chapters involving my favorite pirates, but this quickly turned to despair once Asha was captured and got involved in that whole army getting totally fucked by the elements. If there is one thing GRRM knows how to do better than any writer I've ever encountered, it's to capture the awful brutality of winter. Fuck me. It was a rough read through those chapters. As rough as these are though, the torture of Theon is up there with chapters in "A Little Life" in terms of being some of the most disturbing and nauseating depictions of suffering and torture I've ever read. It's incredible how well paced all of his chapters are and how GRRM manages to accomplish a nearly complete character arc for him in just this book and I found myself even more sympathetic for Theon in A Dance with Dragons than I did with HBO, even if that was one of the few things I'd argue they did well.
What's interesting about this book is that the majority of the political goings-on is happening with Daenerys, as Kings Landing was all covered in the previous book and Tyrion is shockingly tied up in the slave trade for the majority of this one. I was surprised by this, because of course I expected Tyrion to meet up with Daenerys pretty much right away. However, I was pleasantly surprised to see him instead get caught up in a really harrowing and exciting adventure throughout the Eastern kingdoms and in humbling Tyrion while still giving him ample opportunity to use his wits and conversational intelligence, I think that this provided a really interesting grounds for his ongoing character development. Sadly, I don't believe in the Winds of Winter and I don't expect to see where all of this goes with him, but I was thrilled to be surprised by it and every one of his chapters was intensely rewarding to read.
Jon's part in this book is also fucking outstanding. I think the struggle Jon faces in his decisions to support and house the wildlings and somewhat back Stannis are really well represented, as well as the effect these bold decisions have on his men who ultimately kill him. The tension held throughout his storyline and the care GRRM took in representing both sides through multiple different perspectives and cultural struggles was engaging and could be one of my favorite bits of the series overall. In the end Jon goes down like most of the Starks, with morally correct ambitions and his heart in the right place, but woefully ignorant of the politics surrounding global warming and racism. Jon, you fucking idiot, you can't just force people to band together in a cause half of them don't believe in. Your leadership should only ever satisfy the status quo, you big dummy!
Now, I'm gonna get some shit for this one, from someone out there I'm sure...but the Danerys stuff actually wasn't always particularly engrossing for me. This is completely my problem and its an issue I have reading fantasy in general, but I could never get the names and positions of everyone in her world right. I can't tell you how many times I had to consult google over and over for the same group of the 5 or 6 people and the handful of groups that made up her storyline. It became a pretty exhausting experience and to be honest I think it ruined it a little bit for me. I had a hard time getting caught up in the in-depth politics and allusions in Daenerys's world because I was constantly either stopping to google things, or lost as to the significance of each party doing X thing to one another. I also get all of the cities mixed up and I end up googling which one is which there as well. This made the overarching conflicts between the various cities, groups of people, and inner-city conflicts of Daenerys's reign really hard for me to follow, and I'm embarassed to say I don't care to see any more of it. My brain just cant do it. This is what contributes the most to this one being my least favorite in the series.
Film & TV
After Life (Season 2)
Directed by: Ricky Gervais
7.5/10
I generally really like Ricky Gervais as a writer, and even occasionally as a comedian. I think the only thing that keeps me from really enjoying him to the fullest is that he needs to constantly remind you that he is an atheist the same way some dude in high school may have shown you, and that's by just being generally an asshole and constantly provoking arguments with religious folk. He doesn't always shove this in to his work, but in "After Life" more than "Derek" or "Extras" he appears to be playing a character closer to his real life persona, and so naturally his real life perspectives come out in the script more than usual. So yeah, the atheism is a bit much sometimes. The therapist character, too, is a bit over the top and while I was entertained occasionally, mostly it just stole me away from the emotion of the series and was too vulgar to be believable.
Going in to season 2 I was curious and kind of apprehensive about how everything was going to play out, as season 1 had such a good wrap up and I didn't see where else everything could go for this character. I was very impressed with the direction Gervais takes season 2 in once I realised that his angle wasn't going to be "this is what happens after I become a better person" but instead "this is how people misunderstand grief and recovery. It cannot be 'fixed' and treating the person like they are 'fixed' ignores a significant and fragile part of the journey out of grief and suicidal behaviour". I think this is a really, really important message and watching Gervais navigate this emotional perspective was incredible. Gervais really showcases his acting abilities in this season and the particularly emotional scenes are done with quiet dignity while still allowing for the character to be vulnerable and exposing his pain.
This is one of those shows, like much British humour, where I never catch myself laughing or even feeling particularly entertained, but a sensible chuckle is held throughout. The way Gervais writes and directs his characters with such warmth and gentleness is really appealing to me, and I love the postman and sex worker story line. Sometimes I would almost make it through an episode without crying, but then every episode ends with Gervais's character watching old videos of his wife and crying with a glass of wine and it gets me every time. I really respect this idea that is pushed throughout the series that whatever the day may hold for this guy, regardless of if it was a good day or a bad day or one with any kind of lasting epiphany, it always comes back to this awful lonely grief on his couch. It always ends this way. This is hugely depressing, but again also something really important.
At least 4 times I turned to my husband and forbid him from dying while I watched this. I remember when I first got engaged something that frightened me all the time was the commitment to eventually experiencing this grief. To be a widow is a very frightening prospect to me, and Afterlife has not helped sooth that worry. Damn it to heck.
God Knows Where I Am
Directed by: Jedd and Todd Wider
5.5/10
I think this documentary had a lot of potential to unravel the social and ethical issues surrounding mental illness and guardianship and it had many opportunities to really examine the lack of social structure and support for people like Linda in America. However, this documentary very intentionally steers away from this kind of approach and plants its heels firmly in to the emotional aspect in creating this portrait of a woman suffering from schizophrenia and her family effected by it. The tragedy of Linda's death is examined and unpacked in a way that is very respectful and sympathetic to her illness, which I can appreciate and of course I'm glad they do this, but I think avoiding the topic of how and why this tragedy took place over such a significant stretch of time was disappointing to me. You can tell by some of the interviews with family members that they probably spoke with a lot of anger about the lack of support for themselves and Linda and how they must have felt about American virtues preventing Linda from having guardianship granted to her, but none of it made it in to the film.
While I was certainly kept interested and invested throughout this documentary because I felt sympathy and empathy for all of those involved (and the directors do a really good job at pacing out the reveal of Linda's mental illness too which is great), my real passion for these issues will always be with social injustice and social work theory. I guess I feel like if you don't examine how people end up in situations like these and choose only to cover the tragedy, it carries this feeling of hopelessness instead of empowering the story to be indicative of something greater than the sum of its parts.
The American ideals regarding personal freedoms, privacy, and the right to live your life independent of others is lightly touched on but never fully explored even though it is explicitly said that Linda's sister not getting guardianship of her appears to be explicitly a matter of the judge's opinion and there is tons of evidence that supports this. I would've loved to see all of those quick images of evidence of Linda's mental state discussed amongst doctors and the family. I do have a bit of a bias on this subject too because I have very mixed feelings of guardianship in general. In the case of Linda, yes, I do agree that it is a no-brainer that she should have had guardianship granted to a family member. However, as someone who works closely with PDD in a country which does not value the specifically American ideals of liberty as much, I have encountered many instances of guardianship being handed out and abused to the point where quality of life really is thrown in to question.
Does Linda have the right to live freely of her own accord even if she is at risk of harming herself? If her journal entries tell us over and over again that she is happier this way living freely and making her own choices, do we as a society have a right to force guardianship upon her? If her death could be prevented by better supports, medication, and guardianship, is it ok to assume that she could've lived a happier life? Do we get to decide what is best for others? A harm reduction approach would be to require Linda to "check in" every couple days and otherwise let her live her own life, as to preserve her freedoms while still ensuring her general safety. Is this doing enough, or is it just enabling a dangerous lifestyle? To what extent do the wishes of Linda's family have to be respected?
All of these are very interesting and complex questions to me and there are no "right" answers in every case. I really think this documentary could've been a home run if any of these questions were addressed as the family being interviewed clearly had been asking themselves, instead of like 45 minutes of stock footage with a voice-over of Linda's journal being read. I'm not saying the journal wasn't important and interesting, but coupled with the stock footage it was a really overwhelmingly large part of this documentary and it wasn't always particularly illuminating.
Moon
Directed by: Duncan Jones
9/10
Moon is incredible. I have seen it many times now and it continues to have this really enduring quality that makes me feel like its never a bad time to revisit "Moon". I think part of that enduring quality is that there are no real big "hits" or particularly intense scenes. There is intense emotion but it is never thrown at the audience with force, so revisiting the film you never get that realisation that it was good but it will never be as good as the first time you saw it when everything hit you so hard. Instead, Moon has this uniquely quiet and contemplative feel to it and diligently paces itself to keep the focus on this particular mood even when the plot gets progressively more urgent.
I can't properly explain it, but the movie feels "soft" without being comforting or relaxing. I just can't think of another film that captures this steady atmosphere of thoughtful isolation. Of course this feeling the film evokes really compliments it's themes of loneliness, isolation, and later on despair. Moon only has a couple of elements to it, but it's simplicity and minimalism in this respect is again very meaningful and executed perfectly. All you really have is Sam Rockwell, Kevin Spacey computer, the soundtrack, and the set.
Sam Rockwell is very obviously incredible in this. His performance between the 2 Sams is very natural, distinct, and portrays a character arc without showing any of the "middle" which is really interesting. I think a lot of people, maybe particularly men, can relate to the character development of the Sams and the journey between frustration and intensity to a more forgiving calm and comfort in their own ego doesn't need to be shown or said explicitly. Sam Rockwell manages to create that distinction between the two while also continuing to touch down on the core sameness and "soul" between the two. It's such a delicate and outstanding performance, it blows me away every time.
Kevin Spacey computer is also great and delicate, complementing Sam well. The soundtrack, too. Finally, the set just ties all of these moods and performances together. The space station is minimalist and impersonal but not particularly cold or sterile. It looks lived in and comfortable, but not with any outstanding character. I think this is an overlooked piece of importance to this whole film- many space stations are deliberately science-looking with clean cold textures and colour. They are meant to look high tech and foreign. Moon's environment can be seen with "lived in" dirt and grime. The areas still look like a space station, but they look unimpressive and lonely more than they do intense and scientific.
Usually, when a movie takes place in space, the focus is eventually drawn out to the scientific pursuits involved, or the environment is used as a space of danger. What I love about Moon is that outer space and the space station are used more as compliments to themes of loneliness and an isolating factor that separates Sam from the rest of the world. Space allows for Sam's world to seem artificial and illegitimate. Space makes Sam's world quiet and empty. It doesn't really matter what Sam is doing up there and the logistics of how one survives or navigates space never matter. Space isn't really an obstacle or threat in this film like it is in most that take place in outer space. All that matters is what space does to further the mood and themes of the film, and I love it. I love it so much.
The Terminator
Directed by: James Cameron
9.5/10
Kyle Reese and Sarah Connor are my new favourite movie couple.
The chemistry between this scruffy future soldier man completely emotionally dedicated to his mission and this confident but not yet totally badass woman is unreal. It's a corny line, but when Sarah says that the love her and Kyle shared may have been short but it was a lifetime worth of love, it feels genuine. I found myself kind of shocked with how attached I felt to Reese because while I was growing up I felt kind of lukewarm about the first Terminator film (the second one is my favourite by a large margin, at least as far as my opinions 10 years ago). There are so many emotional layers to Reese's motivation and his attraction to Sarah that I just didn't pick up on back then and I think the same goes for Sarah- her reactions to finding out that she is having a son who is a revolutionary in the future, and that her life just went from mundane to one of legacy in a moments notice continues to be powerful and affecting throughout the film.
I just loved it. Every moment of action was legitimately tense, frightening, and had real stakes involved. The terror involved has a really interesting flavour of bleakness throughout which is distinct to the franchise in my opinion. I can't think of another "bad guy is coming after you to kill you" film/franchise that hits me the same way this one does (slasher flicks? Does this count as a slasher flick?). Schwarzenegger is frightening and filmed really well so as to always be capturing him in ways that reveal to us how clearly un-human he is, and yet in public appear to completely blend in. There are a lot of really un-nerving things about the basic concepts in these films that are really affecting me different as an adult than it had as a kid. Maybe its just that I was dumber when I was 16 and didn't take the time to really chew on all this uncanny valley dystopia, the brutal realities of a hopeless war, and the complete lack of legitimate protection one can have in this world from evil. Maybe I was dumb, or maybe these concepts get scarier the longer you live in a world which reflects these sentiments of bleak hopelessness. Maybe I am more afraid of The Terminator now because I know that if he did exist, he would absolutely get away with it and we would be hopeless to defend ourselves. The relentlessness of The Terminator is absolutely what sets it apart from other murderers of its type for me (that, and the uncanny aspect, probably). Just thinking about that scene of it crawling after Sarah in that industrial setting gives me chills.
I think another really smart choice in this film is how they have Reese die during the climax. He does not get any kind of emotional ending. He doesn't die after they have won. He gets murdered right as things are ramping up so that we are left with Sarah at her most vulnerable. Not only does this make everything that follows much more tense and unexpected, but it gives Sarah the opportunity to be brave. Sarah's character arc is incredible and I am SO HYPED for the second one!
I was also shocked to see how well most of the effects hold up in this flick! Considering how clearly aged it is by the vomit-inducing unironic 80's scene (can we discuss Sarah Connor's "bike"? What the fuck was that?), it was wild to see how awesome the makeup and effects on Arnold still look.
This movie is a classic and it's not hard to see why.
Ok also Kyle Reese is a fucking baaaaabe and that contributed to the 0.5 bump on my rating. I couldn't help it. Big crush on Kyle Reese.
Hell or High Water
Directed by: David Mackenzie
8.5/10
This is an excellent film and really excels at giving so much without saying or elaborating on hardly anything. Without the dedicated performances of Chris Pine, Ben Foster, and Jeff Bridges, a lot of the emotion and thematic tension of this film might never have left the ground. However, because the performances are so strong in this movie, the emotional weight is carried very well without any particularly dialogue-heavy scenes or focus on said emotion. It is always there and as the story progresses, little touches of it come through, but it's never demanding any attention.
For example, Tony's strained relationship with his wife receives almost zero screen time or dialogue, but just by the way Chris Pine carries the the emotion surrounding that relationship, the atmosphere evoked through this, and the setting ensure that the viewer knows the bitterness in this relationship is one sided but the grief is profound for all parties. We don't know why they split up, we don't know Tony's perspective on it, we just know that it's hollowed him out like a husk. This can basically apply to the relationships, history, and psychology of every character in this story. The only emotional beat I found at all heavy handed was that of Jeff Bridges's character and his reluctance to retire. I feel his partner brought it up one too many times after the sentiment was already pretty clear, and each mention of it didn't add any particularly new insight or emotion, but still Jeff Bridge's reactions and defence of all of this was spot on and incredible.
The soundtrack, the cinematography, the acting, the script (minimal yet very effective), and the choice to have Tony's wife be a Scentsy boss mama (I saw those stacks of Scentsy pucks on her table. Nice touch) are all perfect.
I love that there is no resolution to this film. The closing statement and feeling is not that either party got what they wanted or needed. What transpired will haunt them both, likely forever.
And one last thing. This is not a note, criticism, or praise of the film at all, but I need to express how fucking baffled I am by the American people. I know that this isn't a case of "movie antics" when like 15 people open fire at, then chase after, the robbers with guns. I am aware that American citizens of Texas will witness a bank robbery and yell "yahoo!" because now they have an excuse to shoot someone and get away with it, and that leaves me fuckin shook if we're being honest. Can you IMAGINE thinking to yourself "oh hell yeah I'm going after these bank robbers with guns! Even if I get killed, at least I died trying to stop a criminal who stole a whole 10 thousand dollars from a bank conglomerate which doesn't effect me or anyone else I know!". Can you imagine being the wife of the cop who died and knowing your husband died trying to stop a fucking bank robber, that THAT is what he died for!? No. This is just madness to me. I might report a bank robbery but no way in hell am I going to try and stop it especially if they have guns! I can't imagine getting excited to pursue dudes with guns, with my gun, in hopes that I can shoot a person and possibly kill them and get away with it, for their heinous crimes against humanity like robbing a bank of basically no money.
Nah. NAH. This is just madness. Then, Jeff Bridges reminds me that in Texas you can shoot and kill anyone who trespasses on your property and it's TOTALLY OK.
What in tarnation?! Get me off of this fucking continent. Alberta is often jokingly called "the Texas of Canada" but I can't even conceive of someone from my home province justifying killing a dude just for being on their property. Well, unless they are native. Then it happens and eventually we all forget about it and call their family and tribe a bunch of whining babies for constantly digging up the past. Oops I done brought politics in to this again. Sorry mom and dad.
Terminator 2: Judgement Day
Directed by: James Cameron
10/10
I was very hyped to watch this movie again. In my teen years it was one of my favourites, easily in the top 10 for several years. For a good portion of my life, this may have been the only action film I can remember enjoying. I must have seen it dozens of times and still, re-watching it this month it blew me away like it always has.
Firstly, the car chase scenes, explosions, and general action of this movie are phenomenal. Not only is tension maintained through the movie and all of these scenes, but the effects are still incredible and the god damn hook hands still gave me chills! Everything looks incredible and is paced so well. Every car chase scenes manages to get better and better until its Arnie barely outrunning a stolen helicopter. I think one thing I really love about the action in these movies, and particularly this one, is that the stakes are incredibly high and the bad guy is always more powerful. Every chase scene results in them getting crashed in to and cut off by the bad guy and their escape is always narrow and unexpected. The constant scramble to remain one step ahead is exciting and terrifying all at once and I think the bad Terminator has just the right level of upgrade and ingenuity that he is constantly an unpredictable threat, but he never feels "cheap" or uninteresting.
But the action isn't even what I would consider to be the best part of this film. For me, what sticks with me is the cinematography, writing, and performances. There are dozens of scenes and images that come to me when I think of Judgement Day. The lighting, minimum 3 incredible sunglasses, architectural aesthetic, costume design, and really good use of slow moving back up shots (I'm sure there is a technical term for this) create this really awesome and unique look and feel to the movie which is only enriched with performances that are raw, engrossing, and gritty.
It would be really easy to dismiss this film, and possibly even the trilogy as a whole, as simple yet effective tense action films, but from a writing perspective they actually have so much to unpack. At this point in 1991, the story is complex but not yet convoluted, and of course it is brilliant. The heart of this story and the focus of this instalment is definitely set on John and Sarah Connor and their strained and complex relationship, and I love this. I love it so much. Every time I watch it I pick up on something new; another level of exposed trauma and how it effects family relationships like these, another level of conceptual depth in Sarah's mental illness & PTSD, another examination of Sarah's character arc from average young woman to a hardened, cynical, and paranoid domestic terrorist. Dialogue is well done in this respect too because while some scenes may depict John humorously explaining a "high five" to good Terminator, immediately afterwards or even during this we will get an inner monologue from Sarah revealing that this robot may be the ideal father figure. Conversations between characters are never bogged down and always exist to evoke more revealing character elements or relationships, to stress the danger surrounding them and the tension each person feels, or to examine human philosophy. That's another thing- these films are deeply philosophical and honestly the philosophy holds up incredibly well, considering it's a doomsday flick! The ongoing narrative between John, Sarah, and good Terminator about morality, whether or not one should kill baby Hitler, and the doomed reality of the human race is fascinating and still relevant today.
One of my favourite shots in any movie ever is in this film. You guessed it- it's Sarah screaming at the fence while Los Angeles blows up, leaving only her skeleton clinging to the fence. Incredible. One of my favourite "romantic" line deliveries is in this as well, which is dream-state Kyle Reese encouraging Sarah to get "on your feet soldier". It's just a little thing, and I guess one could hardly call it romantic, but it gives me chills every time and damn near brings me to tears. Sarah is such a strong, nuanced, and complex character and great evidence that you don't need to make a female character a Mary Sue to have her be empowering and badass.
I also get teary-eyed with John when good Terminator gives that thumbs up in the lava, of course, because I am only human. Only sociopaths or monsters get through this film without emotion, and I love that I can say that about a Terminator film. I love that it manages to be so many things all at once and succeed at all of them. If someone loves this movie, it doesn't even really matter what they love about it. The way I see it, there is nothing in this film I don't also love. Everything is so perfectly and powerfully done and straight up, just awesome. Someone could come up to me and say "I love Judgement Day just because of the way John says 'she's not my mother, Todd'" and I'd have to say yeah, fuck yeah, you are so right.
Every molecule of this film is bitchin and both intellectually and emotionally brilliant. This is fact.
Better Call Saul (Season 5)
Written by: Vince Gilligan
9/10
This is far and away the best season of Better Call Saul. All of the relationships and thematic complexes the show had been building up appear to have come to their climaxes and it was a thrilling, upsetting, emotional journey witnessing it. The last 4 episodes of this season in particular are easy 10/10's and do such a great job at pushing Jimmy to his limits and unpacking the humanity of these situations and characters that absolutely push it above and beyond Breaking Bad for this season.
The humanity examined in Breaking Bad boil down to pity and trauma porn more often than not, and I like that Better Call Saul never does this. Naturally there are awful situations the protagonists and side characters experience in both series, but Saul's emotion and PTSD are examined with a lot more care and realism. Actions have consequences in both series, but Better Call Saul takes the time to show where people are at after the dust settles. The dust never really settles in Breaking Bad. Even the slower episodes still move at 5 times the pace, and characters are constantly either trying to escape or pursue something. Jimmy gets ample opportunity to express his complex character development and changed perspective throughout this season and I felt genuine emotional distress from Bagman onward. Jesse Pinkman seems like the natural comparison to Jimmy from an emotional standpoint and in terms of how the audience is suggested to feel sympathetic towards, but (and this isn't a criticism on BrBa or Jesse's character arc at all, just merely a critical difference) where I feel sympathy and worry for Jimmy, with Jesse the emotion was more painful and horrified.
A shootout in the desert would've been glossed over as if it were nothing in Breaking Bad, even in the early seasons. Characters would be shown recuperating for maybe half of the following episode at most, and then later down the line it would be revealed to be a factor in complex trauma. What I love about Better Call Saul is that after an event like this, 3 episodes are devoted to Jimmy's state of mind and change of heart/motivation. There is a tenderness given to Jimmy that I don't think any character received in Breaking Bad to the same extent.
But anyways, to just discuss the show as a stand-alone for a moment, I gotta talk about Lalo. Lalo is the best villain so far by a country mile. Lalo is charismatic, tense, interesting, and steals the show! Kimmy's performance is also a stand alone win throughout this season, but Lalo is what really blew me away. Some of the earlier episodes of this season move a little slow, but every moment involving Lalo is breathtaking.
Something else really fascinating about this particular season of BCS is that it has begun to build up a series of really intriguing questions and theories. At this point, next season will involve the Breaking Bad timeline of Jimmy's life, but there are still so many pieces that need to be moved and changed before then. The show has been painstakingly deliberate and thoughtful in every choice it makes towards the greater lore and expanded story line of the BrBa universe and it's been thrilling seeing things come together that I could have never predicted. I'm on the edge of my seat discussing what will happen to Kimmy and how Gene fits in to all of this.
Lastly, that reprieve of "Something Stupid" is perhaps one of the most genuinely moving callbacks I've seen in any show ever. Better Call Saul has such a huge heart. If you'd have told me 5 seasons ago that I would be near weeping with relief and genuine affection for a pair of characters like Jimmy and Kim, I would not have believed it. When I started watching this show I think I assumed what everyone else did- that this spin-off would be a fun scrappy prequel of the always entertaining Saul Goodman. Never in a billion years would I have thought that I would be touched more than I am entertained by this show. Vince Gilligan is an artist.
Under the Skin
Directed by: Johnathan Glazer
9/10
Well, that's it. The part of my life where I watch or think about Under the Skin is done now. I watched this film for the second and last time this month and it was about 300 times more unsettling than I remember.
I feel like I use the word "unsettling" often for movies like these, but this may be one of the few that really earns that description. When I say I felt unsettled during and after watching this film, I mean that I came to it as a whole person and I left with parts of me completely disconnected from where they were before. I left this film in a kind of sick and horrified state where I felt like I was made more of cytoplasm than real human soul and tissue. It is unsettling in every sense of the word. I do not feel secure during and after watching Under the Skin. I do not feel safe or ok. I feel deeply and irrevocably disturbed and even though I am in awe for the entire run-time, I am relieved when it is over because I don't want to be in that world any more. Honestly, I barely want to be in this world any more. I've been to Loch Lomond and the highlands where the later half of this movie was filmed. I spent 1 night in the nightlife parts of Edinburgh. I am so fucking glad that I didn't carry this film with me to Scotland. No thank youuuu
God. There were so many things I had forgotten and repressed between my seeing this for the first time when it came out, and this month. I had forgotten about that nauseating shot of the baby crying and being left by both of the aliens on that cold beach in the dark. I had forgotten that a shot of a piece of cake on a fork could make me feel physically ill. Most notably, Christ I don't even want to think about it now, but I had forgotten the entire sequence of the blue dudes after they sink. The sound editing in that scene in particular is criminal and negligent of the mental health of every viewer. I sincerely hope I forget about that sound and the body horror shit that follows. I also hope I forget about the cosmic horror involved in that scene. It is brilliant. It is horrifying and comes straight from the devil and I am grateful that art like this exists to tear me from my soft cushy comfort in this world and my body. I should be grateful, but I am that shivering baby on the beach.
Jesus save me from this movie, oh my god.
The cool trivia bit about a couple of the men the alien lady picks up being real Scotsmen that were filmed candidly at first is neat and mildly unsettling, but I also love the deliberate choice to cast Scottish people with the most incomprehensibly pudding accents on Earth so that both me and alien lady are on the same Earthly plane for a moment, not understanding at all what these people are trying to communicate.
Even when this movie isn't being "evil" or malicious in nature, it still makes me want to hide. Even after the critical turning point where the alien starts to focus instead on getting a grip on humanity instead of performing the blue people blood ritual, it becomes unsettling in a different but equally effective way for me. The Uncanny Valley was discovered long ago but came to true fruition in this truly godless film where just the protagonist examining her fingers is a horror that will haunt me until I die. Possibly even after I die. Release me from this movie. Bathe me in holy water until I feel clean again. I beg God to answer for this film. If he is so loving and merciful, how could he allow this shit to happen? I am that shivering baby on the beach. I am that shivering baby on the beach, weeping and screaming in confusion, and He is that alien. This is my relationship to God now.
Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines
Directed by: Johonathan Mostow
3/10
I struggled with rating this one because on it's own, it is pretty bad, but as an extended piece of the Terminator universe, it is a terminal disease. It didn't feel right giving it a 1/10 like it deserves when taken as part of the universe, but it also doesn't feel right giving it a 5/10 as just a boring early 2000's doomsday movie, so I compromised.
But in my heart, it is a 2.
I honestly don't even know where to start, because I want this to be critical without just being a Cinema Sins ding-count, but I also don't want to launch in to an essay because it doesn't seem right to do an essay on this one and none of the others which are more deserving of it. I'm going to try to sum up the greatest offences in bullet points and then try and walk away and forgive it for existing. So these are my biggest issues with this film and what I believe makes it a malignant tumour on the beautiful body of the other two movies:
Alien
Directed by: Ridley Scott
10/10
One thing this film achieves better than any other science film of this type, in my opinion, is it's ability to create meaningful character relationships without explicit archetypes (the married/dating couple, the sisters, the father figure) and in its climax, to be desperate and expressed so through both the environment and spectacular performances. This film has a lot of screaming and crying but none of them come off as a cliche sci-fi horror scream. This film also has a lot of special effects, but because they are all practical and artistic (and probably obscenely expensive) it never feels cheap or dated even if it's well over 30 years old at this point.
This film is a masterpiece of cinema. This cannot be debated and even discussing it seems like a waste of my time because so many people have done it better. I don't know what I could say that would bring any light to my experience of this perfect film that others may not have had. I could write about how this film is incredibly progressive and humanistic for it's time-both minorities and women are portrayed as real three dimensional people, women in the STEM field are represented without dumbing them down to Big Bang Theory types, and there are no gross white saviour complexes going on.
So shoot.
I think I'll just rave about one of my favourite bits which features the gross and shocking demise of the android (Ash) who then gets decapitated sort of accidentally and then when questioned, delivers some haunting lines before being burned "alive". Obviously the eggs and monsters are brilliant, but I also really love this scene. I love that at first you kind of just get tricked in to thinking that Ash is just following some kind of logical protocol. When he first closes a door on Ripley, you feel shocked and afraid for her and you think you might be reaching a psychological thriller mini-climax at this point. However, this is quickly subverted when he tries to murder Ripley in the most obtuse and brutal way (is he trying to kill her by shoving a magazine down her throat??? I don't really get it but that's part of what makes it frightening I think). Suddenly, he starts spewing awful white blood and seizing on the floor, and the brief emotional trick played on us has completely shifted in to tension and fear. Finally, as a decapitated head, he is briefly interrogated before he delivers crucial information about the alien threat. It cannot be killed, and the company who sent you here doesn't give a shit about you. Finally, he delivers the lines about his admiration for the alien and his final words that will always send a shiver down my spine; "I can't lie about your chances, but you have my sympathies".
I love this bit.
I love this whole movie. Alien is captivating and "cozy" which seems weird to say, but it is. Watching Alien with my husband, whiskey in hand, all bundled up in blankets on a rainy Tuesday evening was perhaps one of the cosiest movie nights of quarantine so far. It wasn't until the end of the movie that I'd realised my whiskey was hardly touched. I just sat there, holding it and speechless the whole film.
Portrait of a Lady on Fire
Directed by: Celine Sciamma
8.5/10
This movie is a slow burn, but when it gets there the burn is third-degree. This is a very bold and ballsy film in a couple of ways. Firstly, it has no soundtrack. With the exception of two scenes (one of which is more cult-like Acapella than it is music, and the other is an incredible long shot than lasts 2 and a half minutes), the only thing heard throughout the film is dialogue, natural sound, and an emphasis on things like breath catching and strained silence.
This is definately not a film for everyone. Despite it starring two stunningly beautiful french women with many full nude scenes, I actually can't recommend it to a lot of people. This movie is extremely dialogue heavy and it feels very long (though, looking back, I can't think of a single wasted moment). While it would be easy to liken this to another French character study starring two lesbians with many nude scenes that moves pretty slowly, "Blue is the Warmest Color", in tone and in terms of cinematography they couldn't be more different.
This movie examines a handful of uncomfortable ideas on the relationship to an artist and their work, how portraits actually aren't portraits at all (the anti-capitalist part of me loved this), the romanticization of myths that are arguably more morally complex than historical depictions would have us believe, and the passion behind forbidden love. The tension in this film often comes from scenes where intentions are unknown or only half-known, words and actions are bold and possibly dangerous, and there are even some scenes and storylines which serve to expose the kind of secret lives of women in the Eighteenth Century. For instance, there are many depictions of various ways women tried to get abortions back then, and each one of them stirred up a little pain and nausea in me.
The way this movie is filmed is also very unique and will either blow your mind or it will be entirely uninteresting to you, depending on your stylistic preferences. Everything is absolutely gorgeous- the women, the landscape, the lighting, the environments, and even the noise or lack thereof. However, despite it's beauty, the camera is always deferring from it, creeping around it, focusing on it only when it is relevant to the cinematic discussion with the dialogue. The acting, too, is phenomenal. I was absolutely spellbound by all three women in this film and at times I felt somewhat betrayed by the camera for panning away. There is one scene in particular when we are in pursuit of Helloise and the camera takes a painstakingly slow pace, leering around cliffs and rocks, until we finally see her and I audibly gasped from release and relief at this. I can't fully explain how all of the elements in this film work so well to be all at once tense, mysterious, moving, and intensely passionate. The hype is absolutely justified in this one.
All of this comes down to the final scene, which as I've mentioned before is a single long-shot set to extremely emotionally stirring music. It is so chest-tightening, thunderous, loud and bold, I thought about it well in to the night and the next morning as well. I can still feel that orchestral heaviness in my chest when I think about it. After two hours of a soundtrack-less movie experience, this last scene hits like a ton of bricks and is indisputably brilliant.
Aliens
Directed by: James Cameron
10/10
This one is decidedly less "cozy" than Alien. This film is up there with "Uncut Gems" as one of the most stressful cinematic experiences of the year for me, but of course in completely different ways. I honestly don't think I breathed more than twice after about the 20 minute mark. It's easy to judge Bill Paxton for being the way he is, especially in the end. He kind of reminded me of characters in Darkest Dungeon who would get that trait where they'd just be stressed and never shutting up until the whole party is stressed and dies. However, at the same time...GAME OVER, MAN. It's game over. I cannot believe I survived this movie. I think I died 4 times. I definitely cried when the kid was in that pool, and this brings me to something I really respect about this movie- it puts children in actual unsupervised danger. This seems kind of like a thing of the past for action/sci-fi movies (are the Alien movies "horror"?) and I love that I never really trusted the safety of anyone, including the child. I was in legitimate awe and shock when the kid got captured by a xenomorph but at the same time I trusted this movie not to take me out of my fear.
Every development in this film increases the threat, cleverly evolves with the environment and resources available, and/or exposes a new trait or threat of the xenomorphs. The term gets used a lot, but I think I was legitimately on the edge of my seat for the entire film. The performances, while notably less charming for me than in the first movie, are still excellent and characters are still uniquely engaging and I felt hit when each of them died.
I also really appreciate how this sequel builds up and excellerates the awesome architecture, engineering, and weaponry of "Alien". It is rare that I really care about guns in a movie, but I found those phneumatic-arm powered bigass flamethrower guns at the hip of bandana woman and pale man to be irresistibly awesome. The mec-suit, too, is obviously one of the most awesome things I've ever seen in my entire life. When Sigourney Weaver gets in to that thing to confront the mother xenomorph, screaming "get off of her you bitch!" I audibly gasped and screamed in delight. Ripley is quickly becoming one of my favourite fictional characters in sci-fi ever and these movies handle her and support her with incredible deft and skill. She is never a Mary Sue. She is never worn out, repetitive, or making choices that betray her character (yet, anyways), and she is both emotionally and physically badass. I am also really impressed with the way her relationship to Newt is treated. The trope of "adult loses child, finds a surrogate child to protect in dire circumstance" is not an uncommon one, but this particular relationship is special to me. Maybe it is because Sigourney Weaver never explicitly calls out the trope and spells it out for us. She never says anything like "I used to have a dughter like you" unprovoked. Though you can tell her feelings towards Newt are motherly in nature, and Newt does view her as a protector, there is also a sense that there is a uniquely trusting relationship going on there that transcends all this.
Ok also Kyle Reese is in this and I didn't expect this and I was THRILLED. Big crush on Kyle Reese. Big crush.
I just have so many more things I want to say. I haven't even touched on how fucking incredible the special effects and creature designs look in this one. The mother xenomorph is an astoundingly terrifying reveal and I love that the xenomorphs got more spotlight yet still remain deeply mysterious and "unknown" in many ways. I love that the face suckers are still a legitimate threat (I know this threat goes away in "Alien: Covenant" and I understand why that is bad now). Everything is so incredibly well done. Both of the Alien films so far have been solid 10/10's for me, though they are very different movies. One is more of a thoughtful and tense sci-fi flick, and the other is definitely more action focused, but both are spectacular.
If there's anything to be gleamed from Aliens, its that you can never trust a capitalist.
I know it's downhill from here. We still have 3, 4, Alien V Predator, Promethius, and Covenant. Yet, I am still excited. If nothing else, for furious note-taking.
Funny People
Directed by: Judd Apatow
6/10
It hurts me to give a Judd Apatow film this low of a score. Judd Apatow is easily one of my top 5 favourite directors/writers and I love me a Serious Sandler, but this is just kind of a flacid film. The performances are great, it's often funny and frequently emotionally evocative and mature, but it is also at least 45 minutes too long.
This movie serves as a really interesting and complex handful of character studies and I think viewing it as that with a dash of Apatow humour and some really fun comedian cameos (including a young Dan Harmon!) makes it seem better than it actually is. There are a lot of really great ideas and ambition in this script, but for every good idea there is a wasted scene or two that slows the film to a hault.
The emotional climax of this scene is legitimately phenomenal and despite my not being rich, famous, or in their 40's like the protagonist of this film, I still felt like I was receiving a bit of an existential crisis going through this. It's not that the main character is relatable, and certainly the point is to expose some of the bizarre realities of living rich, famous, and miserable, but there is an obvious direction of this film that forces you to question whether you are sympathetic to this guy or kind of already done with his shit. Actually...wow. I just realised, this is kind of like a half-baked Bojack Horseman. Holy shit.
One strangely compelling and unique aspect of this film is that blurry line that technically defines this as "fiction" but is definitely intended to be interpreted as semi-biographical and a spotlight on the real-life comedy scene of the time. There are a lot of bits in the production of this film that support this strange realism. For instance, all of the stand-up comedy was written by the actors portraying them. Many films, especially comedies, like to include reference humour, but in this one it actually serves a purpose. Seth Rogen joking about Robin Williams killing himself (this was long before his suicide, BIG oof) and Mark's stupid NBC show are technically references to ours (the audience's) world but they're also weirdly organic because George Simmons is definitely real-life Adam Sandler, Eli is definitely Seth Rogen, and every other character with a fake name is definitely the real actor portraying them. As "George Simmons" reflects on his career, using real bits of Sandler's life and early stand-up as well as hilariously self-aware fake yet totally believable films he does in the later half of his career, you get this initially uncomfortable feeling that you're reading Sander's diary.
But the thing is...This Is The End did this better. Many films have done it better. I just don't know that other films like this have done it as serious, depressing, and authentically believable as Funny People. In This is the End, real-life characters are always portrayed as the joke. Michael Cera being a coke fiend is the joke. In Funny People...there is no joke. It's just "yeah, this is how these people really are. This is what it's like to live like this" and while it makes it a lot less exciting and entertaining of a film, it is an interesting take. Sandler being kind of disgusted with his obnoxious wealth is also very woke and ahead of its time in 2009.
Kyle and I have a theory though that it wasn't leukaemia killing Sandler that whole time. It was his fucking boomer hats. Good LORD. Whoever was in costume design clearly isn't a fan of Sandler.
Alien 3
Directed by: David Fincher
2/10
I expected this to be like Terminator 3 in terms of disappointment. I really expected this to just be a shitty Alien movie, but it's not. It is a shitty movie by any standard. While Terminator 3 is basically just an unremarkable movie outside of it's franchise, and disappointing within it, Alien 3 is just an awful film through and through. To include it in the Alien series seems like an enormous stretch because apart from a dozen minutes of a xenomorph and the presence of a person that is I guess supposed to be Ellen Ripley, it has not one other thing in common with it's predecessors. It is not tense, it is not action-packed, it doesn't really have any aliens or cool effects, and there is nothing "cool" about it. It is so fucking bad. I'm already bored just thinking about it.
I wanted to have my own opinion on this. I do occasionally watch films that I've been told are awful and that I believe probably will be awful. I typically do this because I want to have my own take on it, and because I am curious. I can honestly say this has been the first time in a long time that a movie has been a legitimate waste of my time. 2 and a half hours of wasted time, no less.
There isn't even much to say about it or analyse as to why this is a "bad" Alien movie or why it's a disappointment or a betrayal. The answers to these questions aren't interesting. It's a bad Alien movie because it is just a bad film in general, and it is criminally boring and vapid. This isn't even a betrayal to the series at all. It doesn't do anything "wrong" to the lore or anything, it just sucks. The only reason this isn't a 1/10 is because of that exactly 1 memorable and iconic scene/image. That's it.
This film is vacant, lethargic, and held back in the worst of ways. Ellen Ripley is wierdly un-assertive, uninteresting, is barely even a protagonist. The other 30 characters are all so bland, one-dimensional, and do so little, I have already forgotten them.
So in Alien and Aliens, the threat of the xenomorph and other dangers are constant, urgent, and unforgiving. In Aliens 3, the majority of the movie is spent in stasis and people are completely without any kind of action or urgency. It is an enormously leisurely film. The threat of the xenomorph in this movie is so little, so not a problem, that they have exactly 1 dude without any weapons guarding the door it's stuck behind, and even he is bored. He is almost as bored as we were. Even when they aren't just sitting around waiting for rescue and they are actively pursuing the alien, they can't find it. They give up a couple times, and the alien still doesn't attack them. This is the issue here- the alien isn't hunting. The alien does not appear to have any motivation to kill unless people are poking it like a sleeping bear, and it has none of the heat-seeking skill or ferocity of the others. It's napping, or playing solitaire the whole time or something.
These people "going to fight the alien" while they sit around talking about it for 2 hours of the film appear to be under the same threat of alien attack as I currently am of a bear attack. Yeah, sure I'm fighting the bear by sitting here discussing it. It's not hunting me, but it has killed people before! I don't know where it is, and it doesn't seem to know where I am, and I'm just sitting here leisurely mopping floors and shit, but it's after me I swear! I am not particularly concerned, so I'll probably busy myself doing other things, but I could hypothetically pursue the bear. Then, it might be dangerous. Maybe.
Yeah. This movie is awful. Worst thing I've seen all year by a landslide.
Alien: Resurrection
Directed by: Jean-Pierre Jeunet
5/10
This one is surprisingly ambitious and a breath of fresh air after Alien 3. It's not a particularly remarkable flick, but I can safely say I was never bored. It was almost as if every actor in this film was told point blank to do all of their mundane actions in the most baffling way possible. There are few wasted moments in "Resurrection" and a handful of these moments are legitimately interesting as an exploration of Alien lore. I am fascinated by the evil capitalist masterminds who are constantly fucking up and mixing aliens with Ripley's DNA. I like the scene when she burns that room down even if it is hilariously fucked up that she responds to a clone begging for death by giving them probably the most painful death possible with her weapons. I un-ironically love the scene where they swim in to a kind of trap with eggs and face huggers everywhere, and while I can see the issue of the face hugger being ripped off under-water, at least it was under water. I can believe that with no access to oxygen, face huggers lose their grip. Is it ideal? No. But it isn't the worst thing either.
An eccentric cast is back and sure, they're not a particularly wise or emotionally engaging troupe, but I found them entertaining nontheless. When Winona is revealed to be an android and "Ellen Ripley" says "I knew it, no human is that kind hearted" or something, I audibly laughed out loud. Terrible. But, again, at least it has a flavour. At least it stands out and is unique. Most notably, at least the xenomorphs are front stage again and a legitimate threat. The xenomorphs look awesome again and I was relieved to see that they have returned to their hunting motivations.
You know what I hate though? the not-xenomorph and not-Ripley pale big-eyed baby alien near the end. I hate that thing. I honestly just don't like the xenomorphs being sympathetic in general. I see what they're trying to do with pointing the fingers at the evil capitalists, which is cool, but I'd rather the sympathetic party always be the crew and the xenomorphs an ever evolving threat. There is one explanation for the sudden and kind of wierd sympathetic angle to the xenomorphs, and that idea comes from my genius husband: Kyle says "Alien:Resurrection is the first movie in the series where it seems like the alien was the director". I'm going to chew on this thought for the rest of my life.
Finally, I have to say at this point it does look like I'm never getting the Ellen Ripley I love back, but at least we've got some sort of big dick energy version of her in this one. That basketball scene is iconic even if it meant I had to look at potato-head Ron Pearlman. Eww.
Leave No Trace
Directed by: Debra Granik
7/10
One of the little snippets from reviews on the DVD cover says that "compassion fills every frame" in this film. This is a really apt description of the strengths of this film- the story told is always taking care to show the struggles of a mentally ill veteran with PTSD as well as his daughter who has to live out his risky and isolating survivalist lifestyle.
I read a lot of survivalist memoirs about people who grew up in situations like these and escaped. This appears to be a much more romantic perspective on the realities of these families and the complex issues which surrounds their freedoms and arguable child abuse, and when I researched the book this is based off I learned this is absolutely the case. I don't see this as a "bad" thing though, necessarily. The goal of this film appears to be lending a sympathetic light to the issue of mental health & PTSD victims in America as well as the issues with a strict social-work approach to these families. I believe this film accomplishes this goal because there are heartbreaking moments done in this movie that I will not soon forget, and even when it may be easy to feel frustrated with Ben Foster's character and his stoic demeanour, the director is quick to show you that he is just as trapped as his daughter is.
I love the conclusion of this movie because it is complicated and not super realistic, but it also doesn't soften any blows. In situations like these, every party gets hurt. Ben Foster will have to live the rest of his life out completely alone, inevitably guilty, and suffering until he dies (which likely won't be long, in his state). On the other hand, his daughter may have escaped that lifestyle but she will also live out her life feeling guilty, isolated, and adapting will be challenging. It isn't an easy reality for either of them and there is no easy answer for how support systems and governments should deal with these issues.
It's a good movie. I really like it because I'm invested in these issues and this kind of story. The acting is very good and there are a lot of beautiful shots. However, it is at times disappointingly quiet and slow and if you aren't predisposed to being invested in this, it could potentially be a boring film.
Video Games
Katamari Damacy Re-roll
Created by: Monkeycraft
8.5/10
Na-na na na na na na na Katamari Damacy!
This is the most Japenese game ever made. This game is fifteen times more Japenese than any anime waifu simulator, three hundred times more Japenese than Pokemon, infinitely more Japenese than the entirety of Nintendo. This game lives, breathes, and sings "Japan" out in to the cosmos and honestly it almost feels weirdly patriotic just to take part in it. Everything about it is so joyful, proud, and un-apologetically bizarre to the point where you can't help but be swept up in to its strange catchy show-tunes and absurd art style.
I am really at a loss for words with Katamari Damacy. The soundtrack is so uniquely invigorating that it was not uncommon for my husband and I to hum it regularly. Just thinking about the intro sequence gives me shivers and a feeling of unbridled delight.
This would be a very easy 10/10 if it weren't for the handful of special levels where you can't touch any cows and so on. In concept these are neat but I don't like how it breaks the perfect rhthym the rest of the game has. There is something so indescribably cathartic about rolling that ball up and consuming entire cities, the screaming of children and animals being rolled up in the same ball that started off with a mere 50 thumbtacks or orange peels. Level progression is uniquely engaging and satisfying in this game and it only gets better as you progress the "story". By the time you're at the last level, you're going through a euphoric and dare I say orgasmic 25 minute katamari extravaganza and it's just no use even trying to explain what it is.
You go around the world rolling stuff up in to a ball and then if the rainbow fortune teller game show host God's approve of it, it is shot in to the cosmos. You do this until you have returned the night sky to "normalcy" and all of the Japenese children below rejoice.
It. Is. Incredible.
Golf Story
Created by: Sidebar games
7.5/10
This is a good game. I really enjoyed the golf and I really liked a lot of the other mini-games involved too like disc golf and drone flight. The presentation of this game is great to look at and the soundtrack absolutely SLAPS. The humour was good at times, and other times felt a little too "cute" for me, and this goes for the story too. Sometimes I found the story really fun and hilarious, but most times I probably would've been happy just to skip it. The co-op golfing is really fun too. Kyle actually believed he would kick my ass just because he played Tiger Woods golf a billion years ago, but of course he was wrong. Golf Story makes you feel really good about your golf accomplishments and skilled improvements with superb sound design too. The "birdie" sound will probably permanently release dopamine in to my brain. All around it is a great game, but it's not nearly as good story-wise as reviews lead me to believe. It was, however, funnier than I expected. Usually when I hear that a game is "funny" I play it and learn for myself that its just not the kind of humour I dig. This one I did dig sometimes, and when I wasn't digging it at least it was brief. Every moment spent golfing was an absolute delight though, and that is easily 85% of the game, so I'd definitely play it again.
Donut County
Created by: Ben Esposito
7/10
This game was a bunch of fun and had an awesome art style. Its probably only like 3 hours long, but I was grinning for every moment of it. There is something so satisfying about the main mechanic, too. Just suckin up people's lives in to holes. I mean, how could you go wrong with that? I don't know what else to say about it. It was great, it was exactly the right length, it was silly, and made me smile. Totally worth the time spent playing it.
A Dance With DragonsWritten by: George RR Martin
7.5/10
This one was a lot bleaker than the others, but I'm willing to believe there is some emotional bias to that feeling. It has been a fascinating and exciting journey reading through the Song of Ice and Fire series this year and knowing I'm at the end of the road probably added to a certain level of melancholy. For the record, I do not believe The Winds of Winter is ever getting published. It's been just about a decade now and I just have this nihilistic belief that the HBO ending is the only one we get to have. But it isn't just my personal bias that attributes the the more bleak and brutal atmosphere of this instalment.
Perhaps the bleakest of the perspectives and storylines are all of those involving Stannis and the conquest of the northern lands (Theon/Reek, the pirates, Stannis, Davos, and Jon Snow). I was thrilled at first to see more chapters involving my favorite pirates, but this quickly turned to despair once Asha was captured and got involved in that whole army getting totally fucked by the elements. If there is one thing GRRM knows how to do better than any writer I've ever encountered, it's to capture the awful brutality of winter. Fuck me. It was a rough read through those chapters. As rough as these are though, the torture of Theon is up there with chapters in "A Little Life" in terms of being some of the most disturbing and nauseating depictions of suffering and torture I've ever read. It's incredible how well paced all of his chapters are and how GRRM manages to accomplish a nearly complete character arc for him in just this book and I found myself even more sympathetic for Theon in A Dance with Dragons than I did with HBO, even if that was one of the few things I'd argue they did well.
What's interesting about this book is that the majority of the political goings-on is happening with Daenerys, as Kings Landing was all covered in the previous book and Tyrion is shockingly tied up in the slave trade for the majority of this one. I was surprised by this, because of course I expected Tyrion to meet up with Daenerys pretty much right away. However, I was pleasantly surprised to see him instead get caught up in a really harrowing and exciting adventure throughout the Eastern kingdoms and in humbling Tyrion while still giving him ample opportunity to use his wits and conversational intelligence, I think that this provided a really interesting grounds for his ongoing character development. Sadly, I don't believe in the Winds of Winter and I don't expect to see where all of this goes with him, but I was thrilled to be surprised by it and every one of his chapters was intensely rewarding to read.
Jon's part in this book is also fucking outstanding. I think the struggle Jon faces in his decisions to support and house the wildlings and somewhat back Stannis are really well represented, as well as the effect these bold decisions have on his men who ultimately kill him. The tension held throughout his storyline and the care GRRM took in representing both sides through multiple different perspectives and cultural struggles was engaging and could be one of my favorite bits of the series overall. In the end Jon goes down like most of the Starks, with morally correct ambitions and his heart in the right place, but woefully ignorant of the politics surrounding global warming and racism. Jon, you fucking idiot, you can't just force people to band together in a cause half of them don't believe in. Your leadership should only ever satisfy the status quo, you big dummy!
Now, I'm gonna get some shit for this one, from someone out there I'm sure...but the Danerys stuff actually wasn't always particularly engrossing for me. This is completely my problem and its an issue I have reading fantasy in general, but I could never get the names and positions of everyone in her world right. I can't tell you how many times I had to consult google over and over for the same group of the 5 or 6 people and the handful of groups that made up her storyline. It became a pretty exhausting experience and to be honest I think it ruined it a little bit for me. I had a hard time getting caught up in the in-depth politics and allusions in Daenerys's world because I was constantly either stopping to google things, or lost as to the significance of each party doing X thing to one another. I also get all of the cities mixed up and I end up googling which one is which there as well. This made the overarching conflicts between the various cities, groups of people, and inner-city conflicts of Daenerys's reign really hard for me to follow, and I'm embarassed to say I don't care to see any more of it. My brain just cant do it. This is what contributes the most to this one being my least favorite in the series.
Film & TV
After Life (Season 2)Directed by: Ricky Gervais
7.5/10
I generally really like Ricky Gervais as a writer, and even occasionally as a comedian. I think the only thing that keeps me from really enjoying him to the fullest is that he needs to constantly remind you that he is an atheist the same way some dude in high school may have shown you, and that's by just being generally an asshole and constantly provoking arguments with religious folk. He doesn't always shove this in to his work, but in "After Life" more than "Derek" or "Extras" he appears to be playing a character closer to his real life persona, and so naturally his real life perspectives come out in the script more than usual. So yeah, the atheism is a bit much sometimes. The therapist character, too, is a bit over the top and while I was entertained occasionally, mostly it just stole me away from the emotion of the series and was too vulgar to be believable.
Going in to season 2 I was curious and kind of apprehensive about how everything was going to play out, as season 1 had such a good wrap up and I didn't see where else everything could go for this character. I was very impressed with the direction Gervais takes season 2 in once I realised that his angle wasn't going to be "this is what happens after I become a better person" but instead "this is how people misunderstand grief and recovery. It cannot be 'fixed' and treating the person like they are 'fixed' ignores a significant and fragile part of the journey out of grief and suicidal behaviour". I think this is a really, really important message and watching Gervais navigate this emotional perspective was incredible. Gervais really showcases his acting abilities in this season and the particularly emotional scenes are done with quiet dignity while still allowing for the character to be vulnerable and exposing his pain.
This is one of those shows, like much British humour, where I never catch myself laughing or even feeling particularly entertained, but a sensible chuckle is held throughout. The way Gervais writes and directs his characters with such warmth and gentleness is really appealing to me, and I love the postman and sex worker story line. Sometimes I would almost make it through an episode without crying, but then every episode ends with Gervais's character watching old videos of his wife and crying with a glass of wine and it gets me every time. I really respect this idea that is pushed throughout the series that whatever the day may hold for this guy, regardless of if it was a good day or a bad day or one with any kind of lasting epiphany, it always comes back to this awful lonely grief on his couch. It always ends this way. This is hugely depressing, but again also something really important.
At least 4 times I turned to my husband and forbid him from dying while I watched this. I remember when I first got engaged something that frightened me all the time was the commitment to eventually experiencing this grief. To be a widow is a very frightening prospect to me, and Afterlife has not helped sooth that worry. Damn it to heck.
God Knows Where I AmDirected by: Jedd and Todd Wider
5.5/10
I think this documentary had a lot of potential to unravel the social and ethical issues surrounding mental illness and guardianship and it had many opportunities to really examine the lack of social structure and support for people like Linda in America. However, this documentary very intentionally steers away from this kind of approach and plants its heels firmly in to the emotional aspect in creating this portrait of a woman suffering from schizophrenia and her family effected by it. The tragedy of Linda's death is examined and unpacked in a way that is very respectful and sympathetic to her illness, which I can appreciate and of course I'm glad they do this, but I think avoiding the topic of how and why this tragedy took place over such a significant stretch of time was disappointing to me. You can tell by some of the interviews with family members that they probably spoke with a lot of anger about the lack of support for themselves and Linda and how they must have felt about American virtues preventing Linda from having guardianship granted to her, but none of it made it in to the film.
While I was certainly kept interested and invested throughout this documentary because I felt sympathy and empathy for all of those involved (and the directors do a really good job at pacing out the reveal of Linda's mental illness too which is great), my real passion for these issues will always be with social injustice and social work theory. I guess I feel like if you don't examine how people end up in situations like these and choose only to cover the tragedy, it carries this feeling of hopelessness instead of empowering the story to be indicative of something greater than the sum of its parts.
The American ideals regarding personal freedoms, privacy, and the right to live your life independent of others is lightly touched on but never fully explored even though it is explicitly said that Linda's sister not getting guardianship of her appears to be explicitly a matter of the judge's opinion and there is tons of evidence that supports this. I would've loved to see all of those quick images of evidence of Linda's mental state discussed amongst doctors and the family. I do have a bit of a bias on this subject too because I have very mixed feelings of guardianship in general. In the case of Linda, yes, I do agree that it is a no-brainer that she should have had guardianship granted to a family member. However, as someone who works closely with PDD in a country which does not value the specifically American ideals of liberty as much, I have encountered many instances of guardianship being handed out and abused to the point where quality of life really is thrown in to question.
Does Linda have the right to live freely of her own accord even if she is at risk of harming herself? If her journal entries tell us over and over again that she is happier this way living freely and making her own choices, do we as a society have a right to force guardianship upon her? If her death could be prevented by better supports, medication, and guardianship, is it ok to assume that she could've lived a happier life? Do we get to decide what is best for others? A harm reduction approach would be to require Linda to "check in" every couple days and otherwise let her live her own life, as to preserve her freedoms while still ensuring her general safety. Is this doing enough, or is it just enabling a dangerous lifestyle? To what extent do the wishes of Linda's family have to be respected?
All of these are very interesting and complex questions to me and there are no "right" answers in every case. I really think this documentary could've been a home run if any of these questions were addressed as the family being interviewed clearly had been asking themselves, instead of like 45 minutes of stock footage with a voice-over of Linda's journal being read. I'm not saying the journal wasn't important and interesting, but coupled with the stock footage it was a really overwhelmingly large part of this documentary and it wasn't always particularly illuminating.
MoonDirected by: Duncan Jones
9/10
Moon is incredible. I have seen it many times now and it continues to have this really enduring quality that makes me feel like its never a bad time to revisit "Moon". I think part of that enduring quality is that there are no real big "hits" or particularly intense scenes. There is intense emotion but it is never thrown at the audience with force, so revisiting the film you never get that realisation that it was good but it will never be as good as the first time you saw it when everything hit you so hard. Instead, Moon has this uniquely quiet and contemplative feel to it and diligently paces itself to keep the focus on this particular mood even when the plot gets progressively more urgent.
I can't properly explain it, but the movie feels "soft" without being comforting or relaxing. I just can't think of another film that captures this steady atmosphere of thoughtful isolation. Of course this feeling the film evokes really compliments it's themes of loneliness, isolation, and later on despair. Moon only has a couple of elements to it, but it's simplicity and minimalism in this respect is again very meaningful and executed perfectly. All you really have is Sam Rockwell, Kevin Spacey computer, the soundtrack, and the set.
Sam Rockwell is very obviously incredible in this. His performance between the 2 Sams is very natural, distinct, and portrays a character arc without showing any of the "middle" which is really interesting. I think a lot of people, maybe particularly men, can relate to the character development of the Sams and the journey between frustration and intensity to a more forgiving calm and comfort in their own ego doesn't need to be shown or said explicitly. Sam Rockwell manages to create that distinction between the two while also continuing to touch down on the core sameness and "soul" between the two. It's such a delicate and outstanding performance, it blows me away every time.
Kevin Spacey computer is also great and delicate, complementing Sam well. The soundtrack, too. Finally, the set just ties all of these moods and performances together. The space station is minimalist and impersonal but not particularly cold or sterile. It looks lived in and comfortable, but not with any outstanding character. I think this is an overlooked piece of importance to this whole film- many space stations are deliberately science-looking with clean cold textures and colour. They are meant to look high tech and foreign. Moon's environment can be seen with "lived in" dirt and grime. The areas still look like a space station, but they look unimpressive and lonely more than they do intense and scientific.
Usually, when a movie takes place in space, the focus is eventually drawn out to the scientific pursuits involved, or the environment is used as a space of danger. What I love about Moon is that outer space and the space station are used more as compliments to themes of loneliness and an isolating factor that separates Sam from the rest of the world. Space allows for Sam's world to seem artificial and illegitimate. Space makes Sam's world quiet and empty. It doesn't really matter what Sam is doing up there and the logistics of how one survives or navigates space never matter. Space isn't really an obstacle or threat in this film like it is in most that take place in outer space. All that matters is what space does to further the mood and themes of the film, and I love it. I love it so much.
The TerminatorDirected by: James Cameron
9.5/10
Kyle Reese and Sarah Connor are my new favourite movie couple.
The chemistry between this scruffy future soldier man completely emotionally dedicated to his mission and this confident but not yet totally badass woman is unreal. It's a corny line, but when Sarah says that the love her and Kyle shared may have been short but it was a lifetime worth of love, it feels genuine. I found myself kind of shocked with how attached I felt to Reese because while I was growing up I felt kind of lukewarm about the first Terminator film (the second one is my favourite by a large margin, at least as far as my opinions 10 years ago). There are so many emotional layers to Reese's motivation and his attraction to Sarah that I just didn't pick up on back then and I think the same goes for Sarah- her reactions to finding out that she is having a son who is a revolutionary in the future, and that her life just went from mundane to one of legacy in a moments notice continues to be powerful and affecting throughout the film.
I just loved it. Every moment of action was legitimately tense, frightening, and had real stakes involved. The terror involved has a really interesting flavour of bleakness throughout which is distinct to the franchise in my opinion. I can't think of another "bad guy is coming after you to kill you" film/franchise that hits me the same way this one does (slasher flicks? Does this count as a slasher flick?). Schwarzenegger is frightening and filmed really well so as to always be capturing him in ways that reveal to us how clearly un-human he is, and yet in public appear to completely blend in. There are a lot of really un-nerving things about the basic concepts in these films that are really affecting me different as an adult than it had as a kid. Maybe its just that I was dumber when I was 16 and didn't take the time to really chew on all this uncanny valley dystopia, the brutal realities of a hopeless war, and the complete lack of legitimate protection one can have in this world from evil. Maybe I was dumb, or maybe these concepts get scarier the longer you live in a world which reflects these sentiments of bleak hopelessness. Maybe I am more afraid of The Terminator now because I know that if he did exist, he would absolutely get away with it and we would be hopeless to defend ourselves. The relentlessness of The Terminator is absolutely what sets it apart from other murderers of its type for me (that, and the uncanny aspect, probably). Just thinking about that scene of it crawling after Sarah in that industrial setting gives me chills.
I think another really smart choice in this film is how they have Reese die during the climax. He does not get any kind of emotional ending. He doesn't die after they have won. He gets murdered right as things are ramping up so that we are left with Sarah at her most vulnerable. Not only does this make everything that follows much more tense and unexpected, but it gives Sarah the opportunity to be brave. Sarah's character arc is incredible and I am SO HYPED for the second one!
I was also shocked to see how well most of the effects hold up in this flick! Considering how clearly aged it is by the vomit-inducing unironic 80's scene (can we discuss Sarah Connor's "bike"? What the fuck was that?), it was wild to see how awesome the makeup and effects on Arnold still look.
This movie is a classic and it's not hard to see why.
Ok also Kyle Reese is a fucking baaaaabe and that contributed to the 0.5 bump on my rating. I couldn't help it. Big crush on Kyle Reese.
Hell or High WaterDirected by: David Mackenzie
8.5/10
This is an excellent film and really excels at giving so much without saying or elaborating on hardly anything. Without the dedicated performances of Chris Pine, Ben Foster, and Jeff Bridges, a lot of the emotion and thematic tension of this film might never have left the ground. However, because the performances are so strong in this movie, the emotional weight is carried very well without any particularly dialogue-heavy scenes or focus on said emotion. It is always there and as the story progresses, little touches of it come through, but it's never demanding any attention.
For example, Tony's strained relationship with his wife receives almost zero screen time or dialogue, but just by the way Chris Pine carries the the emotion surrounding that relationship, the atmosphere evoked through this, and the setting ensure that the viewer knows the bitterness in this relationship is one sided but the grief is profound for all parties. We don't know why they split up, we don't know Tony's perspective on it, we just know that it's hollowed him out like a husk. This can basically apply to the relationships, history, and psychology of every character in this story. The only emotional beat I found at all heavy handed was that of Jeff Bridges's character and his reluctance to retire. I feel his partner brought it up one too many times after the sentiment was already pretty clear, and each mention of it didn't add any particularly new insight or emotion, but still Jeff Bridge's reactions and defence of all of this was spot on and incredible.
The soundtrack, the cinematography, the acting, the script (minimal yet very effective), and the choice to have Tony's wife be a Scentsy boss mama (I saw those stacks of Scentsy pucks on her table. Nice touch) are all perfect.
I love that there is no resolution to this film. The closing statement and feeling is not that either party got what they wanted or needed. What transpired will haunt them both, likely forever.
And one last thing. This is not a note, criticism, or praise of the film at all, but I need to express how fucking baffled I am by the American people. I know that this isn't a case of "movie antics" when like 15 people open fire at, then chase after, the robbers with guns. I am aware that American citizens of Texas will witness a bank robbery and yell "yahoo!" because now they have an excuse to shoot someone and get away with it, and that leaves me fuckin shook if we're being honest. Can you IMAGINE thinking to yourself "oh hell yeah I'm going after these bank robbers with guns! Even if I get killed, at least I died trying to stop a criminal who stole a whole 10 thousand dollars from a bank conglomerate which doesn't effect me or anyone else I know!". Can you imagine being the wife of the cop who died and knowing your husband died trying to stop a fucking bank robber, that THAT is what he died for!? No. This is just madness to me. I might report a bank robbery but no way in hell am I going to try and stop it especially if they have guns! I can't imagine getting excited to pursue dudes with guns, with my gun, in hopes that I can shoot a person and possibly kill them and get away with it, for their heinous crimes against humanity like robbing a bank of basically no money.
Nah. NAH. This is just madness. Then, Jeff Bridges reminds me that in Texas you can shoot and kill anyone who trespasses on your property and it's TOTALLY OK.
What in tarnation?! Get me off of this fucking continent. Alberta is often jokingly called "the Texas of Canada" but I can't even conceive of someone from my home province justifying killing a dude just for being on their property. Well, unless they are native. Then it happens and eventually we all forget about it and call their family and tribe a bunch of whining babies for constantly digging up the past. Oops I done brought politics in to this again. Sorry mom and dad.
Terminator 2: Judgement DayDirected by: James Cameron
10/10
I was very hyped to watch this movie again. In my teen years it was one of my favourites, easily in the top 10 for several years. For a good portion of my life, this may have been the only action film I can remember enjoying. I must have seen it dozens of times and still, re-watching it this month it blew me away like it always has.
Firstly, the car chase scenes, explosions, and general action of this movie are phenomenal. Not only is tension maintained through the movie and all of these scenes, but the effects are still incredible and the god damn hook hands still gave me chills! Everything looks incredible and is paced so well. Every car chase scenes manages to get better and better until its Arnie barely outrunning a stolen helicopter. I think one thing I really love about the action in these movies, and particularly this one, is that the stakes are incredibly high and the bad guy is always more powerful. Every chase scene results in them getting crashed in to and cut off by the bad guy and their escape is always narrow and unexpected. The constant scramble to remain one step ahead is exciting and terrifying all at once and I think the bad Terminator has just the right level of upgrade and ingenuity that he is constantly an unpredictable threat, but he never feels "cheap" or uninteresting.
But the action isn't even what I would consider to be the best part of this film. For me, what sticks with me is the cinematography, writing, and performances. There are dozens of scenes and images that come to me when I think of Judgement Day. The lighting, minimum 3 incredible sunglasses, architectural aesthetic, costume design, and really good use of slow moving back up shots (I'm sure there is a technical term for this) create this really awesome and unique look and feel to the movie which is only enriched with performances that are raw, engrossing, and gritty.
It would be really easy to dismiss this film, and possibly even the trilogy as a whole, as simple yet effective tense action films, but from a writing perspective they actually have so much to unpack. At this point in 1991, the story is complex but not yet convoluted, and of course it is brilliant. The heart of this story and the focus of this instalment is definitely set on John and Sarah Connor and their strained and complex relationship, and I love this. I love it so much. Every time I watch it I pick up on something new; another level of exposed trauma and how it effects family relationships like these, another level of conceptual depth in Sarah's mental illness & PTSD, another examination of Sarah's character arc from average young woman to a hardened, cynical, and paranoid domestic terrorist. Dialogue is well done in this respect too because while some scenes may depict John humorously explaining a "high five" to good Terminator, immediately afterwards or even during this we will get an inner monologue from Sarah revealing that this robot may be the ideal father figure. Conversations between characters are never bogged down and always exist to evoke more revealing character elements or relationships, to stress the danger surrounding them and the tension each person feels, or to examine human philosophy. That's another thing- these films are deeply philosophical and honestly the philosophy holds up incredibly well, considering it's a doomsday flick! The ongoing narrative between John, Sarah, and good Terminator about morality, whether or not one should kill baby Hitler, and the doomed reality of the human race is fascinating and still relevant today.
One of my favourite shots in any movie ever is in this film. You guessed it- it's Sarah screaming at the fence while Los Angeles blows up, leaving only her skeleton clinging to the fence. Incredible. One of my favourite "romantic" line deliveries is in this as well, which is dream-state Kyle Reese encouraging Sarah to get "on your feet soldier". It's just a little thing, and I guess one could hardly call it romantic, but it gives me chills every time and damn near brings me to tears. Sarah is such a strong, nuanced, and complex character and great evidence that you don't need to make a female character a Mary Sue to have her be empowering and badass.
I also get teary-eyed with John when good Terminator gives that thumbs up in the lava, of course, because I am only human. Only sociopaths or monsters get through this film without emotion, and I love that I can say that about a Terminator film. I love that it manages to be so many things all at once and succeed at all of them. If someone loves this movie, it doesn't even really matter what they love about it. The way I see it, there is nothing in this film I don't also love. Everything is so perfectly and powerfully done and straight up, just awesome. Someone could come up to me and say "I love Judgement Day just because of the way John says 'she's not my mother, Todd'" and I'd have to say yeah, fuck yeah, you are so right.
Every molecule of this film is bitchin and both intellectually and emotionally brilliant. This is fact.
Better Call Saul (Season 5)Written by: Vince Gilligan
9/10
This is far and away the best season of Better Call Saul. All of the relationships and thematic complexes the show had been building up appear to have come to their climaxes and it was a thrilling, upsetting, emotional journey witnessing it. The last 4 episodes of this season in particular are easy 10/10's and do such a great job at pushing Jimmy to his limits and unpacking the humanity of these situations and characters that absolutely push it above and beyond Breaking Bad for this season.
The humanity examined in Breaking Bad boil down to pity and trauma porn more often than not, and I like that Better Call Saul never does this. Naturally there are awful situations the protagonists and side characters experience in both series, but Saul's emotion and PTSD are examined with a lot more care and realism. Actions have consequences in both series, but Better Call Saul takes the time to show where people are at after the dust settles. The dust never really settles in Breaking Bad. Even the slower episodes still move at 5 times the pace, and characters are constantly either trying to escape or pursue something. Jimmy gets ample opportunity to express his complex character development and changed perspective throughout this season and I felt genuine emotional distress from Bagman onward. Jesse Pinkman seems like the natural comparison to Jimmy from an emotional standpoint and in terms of how the audience is suggested to feel sympathetic towards, but (and this isn't a criticism on BrBa or Jesse's character arc at all, just merely a critical difference) where I feel sympathy and worry for Jimmy, with Jesse the emotion was more painful and horrified.
A shootout in the desert would've been glossed over as if it were nothing in Breaking Bad, even in the early seasons. Characters would be shown recuperating for maybe half of the following episode at most, and then later down the line it would be revealed to be a factor in complex trauma. What I love about Better Call Saul is that after an event like this, 3 episodes are devoted to Jimmy's state of mind and change of heart/motivation. There is a tenderness given to Jimmy that I don't think any character received in Breaking Bad to the same extent.
But anyways, to just discuss the show as a stand-alone for a moment, I gotta talk about Lalo. Lalo is the best villain so far by a country mile. Lalo is charismatic, tense, interesting, and steals the show! Kimmy's performance is also a stand alone win throughout this season, but Lalo is what really blew me away. Some of the earlier episodes of this season move a little slow, but every moment involving Lalo is breathtaking.
Something else really fascinating about this particular season of BCS is that it has begun to build up a series of really intriguing questions and theories. At this point, next season will involve the Breaking Bad timeline of Jimmy's life, but there are still so many pieces that need to be moved and changed before then. The show has been painstakingly deliberate and thoughtful in every choice it makes towards the greater lore and expanded story line of the BrBa universe and it's been thrilling seeing things come together that I could have never predicted. I'm on the edge of my seat discussing what will happen to Kimmy and how Gene fits in to all of this.
Lastly, that reprieve of "Something Stupid" is perhaps one of the most genuinely moving callbacks I've seen in any show ever. Better Call Saul has such a huge heart. If you'd have told me 5 seasons ago that I would be near weeping with relief and genuine affection for a pair of characters like Jimmy and Kim, I would not have believed it. When I started watching this show I think I assumed what everyone else did- that this spin-off would be a fun scrappy prequel of the always entertaining Saul Goodman. Never in a billion years would I have thought that I would be touched more than I am entertained by this show. Vince Gilligan is an artist.
Under the SkinDirected by: Johnathan Glazer
9/10
Well, that's it. The part of my life where I watch or think about Under the Skin is done now. I watched this film for the second and last time this month and it was about 300 times more unsettling than I remember.
I feel like I use the word "unsettling" often for movies like these, but this may be one of the few that really earns that description. When I say I felt unsettled during and after watching this film, I mean that I came to it as a whole person and I left with parts of me completely disconnected from where they were before. I left this film in a kind of sick and horrified state where I felt like I was made more of cytoplasm than real human soul and tissue. It is unsettling in every sense of the word. I do not feel secure during and after watching Under the Skin. I do not feel safe or ok. I feel deeply and irrevocably disturbed and even though I am in awe for the entire run-time, I am relieved when it is over because I don't want to be in that world any more. Honestly, I barely want to be in this world any more. I've been to Loch Lomond and the highlands where the later half of this movie was filmed. I spent 1 night in the nightlife parts of Edinburgh. I am so fucking glad that I didn't carry this film with me to Scotland. No thank youuuu
God. There were so many things I had forgotten and repressed between my seeing this for the first time when it came out, and this month. I had forgotten about that nauseating shot of the baby crying and being left by both of the aliens on that cold beach in the dark. I had forgotten that a shot of a piece of cake on a fork could make me feel physically ill. Most notably, Christ I don't even want to think about it now, but I had forgotten the entire sequence of the blue dudes after they sink. The sound editing in that scene in particular is criminal and negligent of the mental health of every viewer. I sincerely hope I forget about that sound and the body horror shit that follows. I also hope I forget about the cosmic horror involved in that scene. It is brilliant. It is horrifying and comes straight from the devil and I am grateful that art like this exists to tear me from my soft cushy comfort in this world and my body. I should be grateful, but I am that shivering baby on the beach.
Jesus save me from this movie, oh my god.
The cool trivia bit about a couple of the men the alien lady picks up being real Scotsmen that were filmed candidly at first is neat and mildly unsettling, but I also love the deliberate choice to cast Scottish people with the most incomprehensibly pudding accents on Earth so that both me and alien lady are on the same Earthly plane for a moment, not understanding at all what these people are trying to communicate.
Even when this movie isn't being "evil" or malicious in nature, it still makes me want to hide. Even after the critical turning point where the alien starts to focus instead on getting a grip on humanity instead of performing the blue people blood ritual, it becomes unsettling in a different but equally effective way for me. The Uncanny Valley was discovered long ago but came to true fruition in this truly godless film where just the protagonist examining her fingers is a horror that will haunt me until I die. Possibly even after I die. Release me from this movie. Bathe me in holy water until I feel clean again. I beg God to answer for this film. If he is so loving and merciful, how could he allow this shit to happen? I am that shivering baby on the beach. I am that shivering baby on the beach, weeping and screaming in confusion, and He is that alien. This is my relationship to God now.
Terminator 3: Rise of the MachinesDirected by: Johonathan Mostow
3/10
I struggled with rating this one because on it's own, it is pretty bad, but as an extended piece of the Terminator universe, it is a terminal disease. It didn't feel right giving it a 1/10 like it deserves when taken as part of the universe, but it also doesn't feel right giving it a 5/10 as just a boring early 2000's doomsday movie, so I compromised.
But in my heart, it is a 2.
I honestly don't even know where to start, because I want this to be critical without just being a Cinema Sins ding-count, but I also don't want to launch in to an essay because it doesn't seem right to do an essay on this one and none of the others which are more deserving of it. I'm going to try to sum up the greatest offences in bullet points and then try and walk away and forgive it for existing. So these are my biggest issues with this film and what I believe makes it a malignant tumour on the beautiful body of the other two movies:
- A disappointing absence of atmosphere due to a soundtrack without any of the characteristic heaviness or personality, non-dynamic and nonthreatening environments, dogshit performances, and very few injuries or tense setbacks
- This movie taught me it is possible to make a Terminator a Mary Sue. Her having mind powers is a huge issue for me. Terminators need to be relentless physical threats to be effective. Having her be able to mind control other machines is not nearly as interesting visually, tension-wise, and for fight scenes as previous terminators were. It also makes her seem "unfair" in a way the others weren't. Terminators are always supposed to be over-powered, but they should mostly be using their untouchable bodies, unstoppable force, and obtainable weapons as threats.
- Sarah Connor is the heart of the franchise. It's fine to not include her in some movies, but you have to at least carry forward her arc and philosophy
- This film has an offensive and disgusting lack of discussion or thematic touches on morality or philosophy, both of which were heavily involved in previous movies. There are no scenes of characters grappling with their duties and actions, changes of heart or difficult moral choices, or disturbing imagery (at least, none that feel genuine. This is also partly the fault of dogshit performances and a poor script)
- John Connor telling Veterinarian Lady that she "reminds him of his mother" when she shoots the flying machine is, and I don't say this lightly, one of the most brutal assaults to a series I have ever seen. I will watch the entire last season of Game of Thrones before I have to see this scene again. I cannot fucking believe he said that. This isn't just weird and gross in a Freudian way, but is essentially spitting on Sarah Connor's grave and making it look cool or significant somehow. Sarah Connor did not just stand up and grab a gun. She had motivation, a character arc, and multiple layers of mental health challenges associated with her relationship to her combat skills. Sarah Connor did not just pick up a gun. She first adapted to a terrifying and hopeless world. Eat shit John Connor.
- John Connor's complete lack of character development and no examination at all (save exactly 1 poorely delivered sentence) on whatever paranoia, guilt, and other qualms he may have with his role on Earth and Judgement Day is such a wasted opportunity. How does he deal with the fact that he might not be the saviour he was built up to be any more? How did his relationship to his mother evolve after they" prevented judgement day"? How does living constantly on the run and paranoid effect him and does it give him a greater love and understanding for his mother? You know what. Lets not examine those things at all. John Connor is a greasy early 2000s badboi who is I guess in love with some girl he kissed once in middle school. John Connor somehow went from the charasmatic and strong willed teenager he was to this absolute wet noodle of a man and the movie offers zero elaboration on how this happened.
- The romance plot is abysmal. Romance can be done well and has been done well in this series. Kyle Reese and Sarah Connor probably get half as much scene time and dialogue as John and Vet lady, and yet their relationship feels genuine and carries a lot of thematic weight. Vet lady is literally just a plot device. To be fair, Miles (in T2) was also a plot device, however his place in the plot also drove forward several moral and thematic ideas in the series, and some of the most important elements to Sarah's arc involve her discussions with him and choice not to murder him. He is a plot device that is critical. He is not just there for excuses. Vet lady does not change John Connor. They just...made out in middle school. And that's it. She adds nothing to any relationship and is a nothing character. She does not remind me of John Connor's mother. Once again, I cannot fucking believe he said that.
AlienDirected by: Ridley Scott
10/10
One thing this film achieves better than any other science film of this type, in my opinion, is it's ability to create meaningful character relationships without explicit archetypes (the married/dating couple, the sisters, the father figure) and in its climax, to be desperate and expressed so through both the environment and spectacular performances. This film has a lot of screaming and crying but none of them come off as a cliche sci-fi horror scream. This film also has a lot of special effects, but because they are all practical and artistic (and probably obscenely expensive) it never feels cheap or dated even if it's well over 30 years old at this point.
This film is a masterpiece of cinema. This cannot be debated and even discussing it seems like a waste of my time because so many people have done it better. I don't know what I could say that would bring any light to my experience of this perfect film that others may not have had. I could write about how this film is incredibly progressive and humanistic for it's time-both minorities and women are portrayed as real three dimensional people, women in the STEM field are represented without dumbing them down to Big Bang Theory types, and there are no gross white saviour complexes going on.
So shoot.
I think I'll just rave about one of my favourite bits which features the gross and shocking demise of the android (Ash) who then gets decapitated sort of accidentally and then when questioned, delivers some haunting lines before being burned "alive". Obviously the eggs and monsters are brilliant, but I also really love this scene. I love that at first you kind of just get tricked in to thinking that Ash is just following some kind of logical protocol. When he first closes a door on Ripley, you feel shocked and afraid for her and you think you might be reaching a psychological thriller mini-climax at this point. However, this is quickly subverted when he tries to murder Ripley in the most obtuse and brutal way (is he trying to kill her by shoving a magazine down her throat??? I don't really get it but that's part of what makes it frightening I think). Suddenly, he starts spewing awful white blood and seizing on the floor, and the brief emotional trick played on us has completely shifted in to tension and fear. Finally, as a decapitated head, he is briefly interrogated before he delivers crucial information about the alien threat. It cannot be killed, and the company who sent you here doesn't give a shit about you. Finally, he delivers the lines about his admiration for the alien and his final words that will always send a shiver down my spine; "I can't lie about your chances, but you have my sympathies".
I love this bit.
I love this whole movie. Alien is captivating and "cozy" which seems weird to say, but it is. Watching Alien with my husband, whiskey in hand, all bundled up in blankets on a rainy Tuesday evening was perhaps one of the cosiest movie nights of quarantine so far. It wasn't until the end of the movie that I'd realised my whiskey was hardly touched. I just sat there, holding it and speechless the whole film.
Portrait of a Lady on FireDirected by: Celine Sciamma
8.5/10
This movie is a slow burn, but when it gets there the burn is third-degree. This is a very bold and ballsy film in a couple of ways. Firstly, it has no soundtrack. With the exception of two scenes (one of which is more cult-like Acapella than it is music, and the other is an incredible long shot than lasts 2 and a half minutes), the only thing heard throughout the film is dialogue, natural sound, and an emphasis on things like breath catching and strained silence.
This is definately not a film for everyone. Despite it starring two stunningly beautiful french women with many full nude scenes, I actually can't recommend it to a lot of people. This movie is extremely dialogue heavy and it feels very long (though, looking back, I can't think of a single wasted moment). While it would be easy to liken this to another French character study starring two lesbians with many nude scenes that moves pretty slowly, "Blue is the Warmest Color", in tone and in terms of cinematography they couldn't be more different.
This movie examines a handful of uncomfortable ideas on the relationship to an artist and their work, how portraits actually aren't portraits at all (the anti-capitalist part of me loved this), the romanticization of myths that are arguably more morally complex than historical depictions would have us believe, and the passion behind forbidden love. The tension in this film often comes from scenes where intentions are unknown or only half-known, words and actions are bold and possibly dangerous, and there are even some scenes and storylines which serve to expose the kind of secret lives of women in the Eighteenth Century. For instance, there are many depictions of various ways women tried to get abortions back then, and each one of them stirred up a little pain and nausea in me.
The way this movie is filmed is also very unique and will either blow your mind or it will be entirely uninteresting to you, depending on your stylistic preferences. Everything is absolutely gorgeous- the women, the landscape, the lighting, the environments, and even the noise or lack thereof. However, despite it's beauty, the camera is always deferring from it, creeping around it, focusing on it only when it is relevant to the cinematic discussion with the dialogue. The acting, too, is phenomenal. I was absolutely spellbound by all three women in this film and at times I felt somewhat betrayed by the camera for panning away. There is one scene in particular when we are in pursuit of Helloise and the camera takes a painstakingly slow pace, leering around cliffs and rocks, until we finally see her and I audibly gasped from release and relief at this. I can't fully explain how all of the elements in this film work so well to be all at once tense, mysterious, moving, and intensely passionate. The hype is absolutely justified in this one.
All of this comes down to the final scene, which as I've mentioned before is a single long-shot set to extremely emotionally stirring music. It is so chest-tightening, thunderous, loud and bold, I thought about it well in to the night and the next morning as well. I can still feel that orchestral heaviness in my chest when I think about it. After two hours of a soundtrack-less movie experience, this last scene hits like a ton of bricks and is indisputably brilliant.
AliensDirected by: James Cameron
10/10
This one is decidedly less "cozy" than Alien. This film is up there with "Uncut Gems" as one of the most stressful cinematic experiences of the year for me, but of course in completely different ways. I honestly don't think I breathed more than twice after about the 20 minute mark. It's easy to judge Bill Paxton for being the way he is, especially in the end. He kind of reminded me of characters in Darkest Dungeon who would get that trait where they'd just be stressed and never shutting up until the whole party is stressed and dies. However, at the same time...GAME OVER, MAN. It's game over. I cannot believe I survived this movie. I think I died 4 times. I definitely cried when the kid was in that pool, and this brings me to something I really respect about this movie- it puts children in actual unsupervised danger. This seems kind of like a thing of the past for action/sci-fi movies (are the Alien movies "horror"?) and I love that I never really trusted the safety of anyone, including the child. I was in legitimate awe and shock when the kid got captured by a xenomorph but at the same time I trusted this movie not to take me out of my fear.
Every development in this film increases the threat, cleverly evolves with the environment and resources available, and/or exposes a new trait or threat of the xenomorphs. The term gets used a lot, but I think I was legitimately on the edge of my seat for the entire film. The performances, while notably less charming for me than in the first movie, are still excellent and characters are still uniquely engaging and I felt hit when each of them died.
I also really appreciate how this sequel builds up and excellerates the awesome architecture, engineering, and weaponry of "Alien". It is rare that I really care about guns in a movie, but I found those phneumatic-arm powered bigass flamethrower guns at the hip of bandana woman and pale man to be irresistibly awesome. The mec-suit, too, is obviously one of the most awesome things I've ever seen in my entire life. When Sigourney Weaver gets in to that thing to confront the mother xenomorph, screaming "get off of her you bitch!" I audibly gasped and screamed in delight. Ripley is quickly becoming one of my favourite fictional characters in sci-fi ever and these movies handle her and support her with incredible deft and skill. She is never a Mary Sue. She is never worn out, repetitive, or making choices that betray her character (yet, anyways), and she is both emotionally and physically badass. I am also really impressed with the way her relationship to Newt is treated. The trope of "adult loses child, finds a surrogate child to protect in dire circumstance" is not an uncommon one, but this particular relationship is special to me. Maybe it is because Sigourney Weaver never explicitly calls out the trope and spells it out for us. She never says anything like "I used to have a dughter like you" unprovoked. Though you can tell her feelings towards Newt are motherly in nature, and Newt does view her as a protector, there is also a sense that there is a uniquely trusting relationship going on there that transcends all this.
Ok also Kyle Reese is in this and I didn't expect this and I was THRILLED. Big crush on Kyle Reese. Big crush.
I just have so many more things I want to say. I haven't even touched on how fucking incredible the special effects and creature designs look in this one. The mother xenomorph is an astoundingly terrifying reveal and I love that the xenomorphs got more spotlight yet still remain deeply mysterious and "unknown" in many ways. I love that the face suckers are still a legitimate threat (I know this threat goes away in "Alien: Covenant" and I understand why that is bad now). Everything is so incredibly well done. Both of the Alien films so far have been solid 10/10's for me, though they are very different movies. One is more of a thoughtful and tense sci-fi flick, and the other is definitely more action focused, but both are spectacular.
If there's anything to be gleamed from Aliens, its that you can never trust a capitalist.
I know it's downhill from here. We still have 3, 4, Alien V Predator, Promethius, and Covenant. Yet, I am still excited. If nothing else, for furious note-taking.
Funny PeopleDirected by: Judd Apatow
6/10
It hurts me to give a Judd Apatow film this low of a score. Judd Apatow is easily one of my top 5 favourite directors/writers and I love me a Serious Sandler, but this is just kind of a flacid film. The performances are great, it's often funny and frequently emotionally evocative and mature, but it is also at least 45 minutes too long.
This movie serves as a really interesting and complex handful of character studies and I think viewing it as that with a dash of Apatow humour and some really fun comedian cameos (including a young Dan Harmon!) makes it seem better than it actually is. There are a lot of really great ideas and ambition in this script, but for every good idea there is a wasted scene or two that slows the film to a hault.
The emotional climax of this scene is legitimately phenomenal and despite my not being rich, famous, or in their 40's like the protagonist of this film, I still felt like I was receiving a bit of an existential crisis going through this. It's not that the main character is relatable, and certainly the point is to expose some of the bizarre realities of living rich, famous, and miserable, but there is an obvious direction of this film that forces you to question whether you are sympathetic to this guy or kind of already done with his shit. Actually...wow. I just realised, this is kind of like a half-baked Bojack Horseman. Holy shit.
One strangely compelling and unique aspect of this film is that blurry line that technically defines this as "fiction" but is definitely intended to be interpreted as semi-biographical and a spotlight on the real-life comedy scene of the time. There are a lot of bits in the production of this film that support this strange realism. For instance, all of the stand-up comedy was written by the actors portraying them. Many films, especially comedies, like to include reference humour, but in this one it actually serves a purpose. Seth Rogen joking about Robin Williams killing himself (this was long before his suicide, BIG oof) and Mark's stupid NBC show are technically references to ours (the audience's) world but they're also weirdly organic because George Simmons is definitely real-life Adam Sandler, Eli is definitely Seth Rogen, and every other character with a fake name is definitely the real actor portraying them. As "George Simmons" reflects on his career, using real bits of Sandler's life and early stand-up as well as hilariously self-aware fake yet totally believable films he does in the later half of his career, you get this initially uncomfortable feeling that you're reading Sander's diary.
But the thing is...This Is The End did this better. Many films have done it better. I just don't know that other films like this have done it as serious, depressing, and authentically believable as Funny People. In This is the End, real-life characters are always portrayed as the joke. Michael Cera being a coke fiend is the joke. In Funny People...there is no joke. It's just "yeah, this is how these people really are. This is what it's like to live like this" and while it makes it a lot less exciting and entertaining of a film, it is an interesting take. Sandler being kind of disgusted with his obnoxious wealth is also very woke and ahead of its time in 2009.
Kyle and I have a theory though that it wasn't leukaemia killing Sandler that whole time. It was his fucking boomer hats. Good LORD. Whoever was in costume design clearly isn't a fan of Sandler.
Alien 3Directed by: David Fincher
2/10
I expected this to be like Terminator 3 in terms of disappointment. I really expected this to just be a shitty Alien movie, but it's not. It is a shitty movie by any standard. While Terminator 3 is basically just an unremarkable movie outside of it's franchise, and disappointing within it, Alien 3 is just an awful film through and through. To include it in the Alien series seems like an enormous stretch because apart from a dozen minutes of a xenomorph and the presence of a person that is I guess supposed to be Ellen Ripley, it has not one other thing in common with it's predecessors. It is not tense, it is not action-packed, it doesn't really have any aliens or cool effects, and there is nothing "cool" about it. It is so fucking bad. I'm already bored just thinking about it.
I wanted to have my own opinion on this. I do occasionally watch films that I've been told are awful and that I believe probably will be awful. I typically do this because I want to have my own take on it, and because I am curious. I can honestly say this has been the first time in a long time that a movie has been a legitimate waste of my time. 2 and a half hours of wasted time, no less.
There isn't even much to say about it or analyse as to why this is a "bad" Alien movie or why it's a disappointment or a betrayal. The answers to these questions aren't interesting. It's a bad Alien movie because it is just a bad film in general, and it is criminally boring and vapid. This isn't even a betrayal to the series at all. It doesn't do anything "wrong" to the lore or anything, it just sucks. The only reason this isn't a 1/10 is because of that exactly 1 memorable and iconic scene/image. That's it.
This film is vacant, lethargic, and held back in the worst of ways. Ellen Ripley is wierdly un-assertive, uninteresting, is barely even a protagonist. The other 30 characters are all so bland, one-dimensional, and do so little, I have already forgotten them.
So in Alien and Aliens, the threat of the xenomorph and other dangers are constant, urgent, and unforgiving. In Aliens 3, the majority of the movie is spent in stasis and people are completely without any kind of action or urgency. It is an enormously leisurely film. The threat of the xenomorph in this movie is so little, so not a problem, that they have exactly 1 dude without any weapons guarding the door it's stuck behind, and even he is bored. He is almost as bored as we were. Even when they aren't just sitting around waiting for rescue and they are actively pursuing the alien, they can't find it. They give up a couple times, and the alien still doesn't attack them. This is the issue here- the alien isn't hunting. The alien does not appear to have any motivation to kill unless people are poking it like a sleeping bear, and it has none of the heat-seeking skill or ferocity of the others. It's napping, or playing solitaire the whole time or something.
These people "going to fight the alien" while they sit around talking about it for 2 hours of the film appear to be under the same threat of alien attack as I currently am of a bear attack. Yeah, sure I'm fighting the bear by sitting here discussing it. It's not hunting me, but it has killed people before! I don't know where it is, and it doesn't seem to know where I am, and I'm just sitting here leisurely mopping floors and shit, but it's after me I swear! I am not particularly concerned, so I'll probably busy myself doing other things, but I could hypothetically pursue the bear. Then, it might be dangerous. Maybe.
Yeah. This movie is awful. Worst thing I've seen all year by a landslide.
Directed by: Jean-Pierre Jeunet
5/10
This one is surprisingly ambitious and a breath of fresh air after Alien 3. It's not a particularly remarkable flick, but I can safely say I was never bored. It was almost as if every actor in this film was told point blank to do all of their mundane actions in the most baffling way possible. There are few wasted moments in "Resurrection" and a handful of these moments are legitimately interesting as an exploration of Alien lore. I am fascinated by the evil capitalist masterminds who are constantly fucking up and mixing aliens with Ripley's DNA. I like the scene when she burns that room down even if it is hilariously fucked up that she responds to a clone begging for death by giving them probably the most painful death possible with her weapons. I un-ironically love the scene where they swim in to a kind of trap with eggs and face huggers everywhere, and while I can see the issue of the face hugger being ripped off under-water, at least it was under water. I can believe that with no access to oxygen, face huggers lose their grip. Is it ideal? No. But it isn't the worst thing either.
An eccentric cast is back and sure, they're not a particularly wise or emotionally engaging troupe, but I found them entertaining nontheless. When Winona is revealed to be an android and "Ellen Ripley" says "I knew it, no human is that kind hearted" or something, I audibly laughed out loud. Terrible. But, again, at least it has a flavour. At least it stands out and is unique. Most notably, at least the xenomorphs are front stage again and a legitimate threat. The xenomorphs look awesome again and I was relieved to see that they have returned to their hunting motivations.
You know what I hate though? the not-xenomorph and not-Ripley pale big-eyed baby alien near the end. I hate that thing. I honestly just don't like the xenomorphs being sympathetic in general. I see what they're trying to do with pointing the fingers at the evil capitalists, which is cool, but I'd rather the sympathetic party always be the crew and the xenomorphs an ever evolving threat. There is one explanation for the sudden and kind of wierd sympathetic angle to the xenomorphs, and that idea comes from my genius husband: Kyle says "Alien:Resurrection is the first movie in the series where it seems like the alien was the director". I'm going to chew on this thought for the rest of my life.
Finally, I have to say at this point it does look like I'm never getting the Ellen Ripley I love back, but at least we've got some sort of big dick energy version of her in this one. That basketball scene is iconic even if it meant I had to look at potato-head Ron Pearlman. Eww.
Leave No TraceDirected by: Debra Granik
7/10
One of the little snippets from reviews on the DVD cover says that "compassion fills every frame" in this film. This is a really apt description of the strengths of this film- the story told is always taking care to show the struggles of a mentally ill veteran with PTSD as well as his daughter who has to live out his risky and isolating survivalist lifestyle.
I read a lot of survivalist memoirs about people who grew up in situations like these and escaped. This appears to be a much more romantic perspective on the realities of these families and the complex issues which surrounds their freedoms and arguable child abuse, and when I researched the book this is based off I learned this is absolutely the case. I don't see this as a "bad" thing though, necessarily. The goal of this film appears to be lending a sympathetic light to the issue of mental health & PTSD victims in America as well as the issues with a strict social-work approach to these families. I believe this film accomplishes this goal because there are heartbreaking moments done in this movie that I will not soon forget, and even when it may be easy to feel frustrated with Ben Foster's character and his stoic demeanour, the director is quick to show you that he is just as trapped as his daughter is.
I love the conclusion of this movie because it is complicated and not super realistic, but it also doesn't soften any blows. In situations like these, every party gets hurt. Ben Foster will have to live the rest of his life out completely alone, inevitably guilty, and suffering until he dies (which likely won't be long, in his state). On the other hand, his daughter may have escaped that lifestyle but she will also live out her life feeling guilty, isolated, and adapting will be challenging. It isn't an easy reality for either of them and there is no easy answer for how support systems and governments should deal with these issues.
It's a good movie. I really like it because I'm invested in these issues and this kind of story. The acting is very good and there are a lot of beautiful shots. However, it is at times disappointingly quiet and slow and if you aren't predisposed to being invested in this, it could potentially be a boring film.
Video Games
Katamari Damacy Re-rollCreated by: Monkeycraft
8.5/10
Na-na na na na na na na Katamari Damacy!
This is the most Japenese game ever made. This game is fifteen times more Japenese than any anime waifu simulator, three hundred times more Japenese than Pokemon, infinitely more Japenese than the entirety of Nintendo. This game lives, breathes, and sings "Japan" out in to the cosmos and honestly it almost feels weirdly patriotic just to take part in it. Everything about it is so joyful, proud, and un-apologetically bizarre to the point where you can't help but be swept up in to its strange catchy show-tunes and absurd art style.
I am really at a loss for words with Katamari Damacy. The soundtrack is so uniquely invigorating that it was not uncommon for my husband and I to hum it regularly. Just thinking about the intro sequence gives me shivers and a feeling of unbridled delight.
This would be a very easy 10/10 if it weren't for the handful of special levels where you can't touch any cows and so on. In concept these are neat but I don't like how it breaks the perfect rhthym the rest of the game has. There is something so indescribably cathartic about rolling that ball up and consuming entire cities, the screaming of children and animals being rolled up in the same ball that started off with a mere 50 thumbtacks or orange peels. Level progression is uniquely engaging and satisfying in this game and it only gets better as you progress the "story". By the time you're at the last level, you're going through a euphoric and dare I say orgasmic 25 minute katamari extravaganza and it's just no use even trying to explain what it is.
You go around the world rolling stuff up in to a ball and then if the rainbow fortune teller game show host God's approve of it, it is shot in to the cosmos. You do this until you have returned the night sky to "normalcy" and all of the Japenese children below rejoice.
It. Is. Incredible.
Golf StoryCreated by: Sidebar games
7.5/10
This is a good game. I really enjoyed the golf and I really liked a lot of the other mini-games involved too like disc golf and drone flight. The presentation of this game is great to look at and the soundtrack absolutely SLAPS. The humour was good at times, and other times felt a little too "cute" for me, and this goes for the story too. Sometimes I found the story really fun and hilarious, but most times I probably would've been happy just to skip it. The co-op golfing is really fun too. Kyle actually believed he would kick my ass just because he played Tiger Woods golf a billion years ago, but of course he was wrong. Golf Story makes you feel really good about your golf accomplishments and skilled improvements with superb sound design too. The "birdie" sound will probably permanently release dopamine in to my brain. All around it is a great game, but it's not nearly as good story-wise as reviews lead me to believe. It was, however, funnier than I expected. Usually when I hear that a game is "funny" I play it and learn for myself that its just not the kind of humour I dig. This one I did dig sometimes, and when I wasn't digging it at least it was brief. Every moment spent golfing was an absolute delight though, and that is easily 85% of the game, so I'd definitely play it again.
Donut CountyCreated by: Ben Esposito
7/10
This game was a bunch of fun and had an awesome art style. Its probably only like 3 hours long, but I was grinning for every moment of it. There is something so satisfying about the main mechanic, too. Just suckin up people's lives in to holes. I mean, how could you go wrong with that? I don't know what else to say about it. It was great, it was exactly the right length, it was silly, and made me smile. Totally worth the time spent playing it.
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